Teaching the homies

 I had dinner with my boss. She invited me over for a Friday afternoon feast. She's great. Half-Lebanese, half-Indian. Pretty good combo because she's fun and crazy and muslim and arab. I feel like she isn't very conservative or traditional as far as male-female relations and contact go. For example, she'll grab my arm when she talks to me or put her arm around me. And she says that I'm her second mom when we're at work. When I went to her home, everyone called me her boyfriend. It was a good long-term joke that lasted the whole day and I loved it! Fun times. The people here are the same as anywhere else in the world. I meet people sometimes and I'm like, Woah that person is EXACTLY like so-and-so back home. They just speak different languages and wear different clothing, but same jokes and same desires in life! So cool. 

Lunch was amazing:

[Tabouleh. Soo good.]

[Indian rice and chicken. Sooooo good. And stuffed squash with chicken and diwaali on the right.]

[The whole gang.]

[Swinging and talking with my boss.]

It was such a good time. After lunch, I got to go with her son to a wedding engagement thingy. The steps to get married are more extensive than in America. At this stage, the groom had already seen the bride and they had gotten to know each other a little through a small serious of social gatherings where few members of both families are present. They go over some basic things and see if they like each other, etc. Then they might decide to get married. So they hold an engagement ceremony. We went to the groom's home (friend of the guy I was with) and all drank coffee. Well, most of us did. And then we got in all of our cars and drove to a specified part of town where a nice tent was set up with red carpets and nice chairs. All of the bride's relatives were present and we entered, greeting each one. Mind you, this is only for the men. The bride and her buddies are hanging out with her, awaiting the news that the engagement is final. 

We enter the tent. A cup of coffee is placed before the groom's dad, I think. Now, he can't drink the coffee right away. That is not a good thing if he does. He first has to give some words and finalize the coffee BEFORE he drinks it. So, the groom's father gave some words about their view on marriage and the promises and awesomeness that will soon ensue if the engagement goes through. Then a guy from the mosque, maybe a sheikh, stood up and recited some Qur'an (I think) and gave some finalities concerning the engagement. The bride's father agreed and then the sheikh said, "You may now drink your coffee!" and everyone cheered and the coffee was drunk and then they passed around coffee for everyone to drink! And some guy also pulled out a gun and shot 14 shots into the air. It was really loud. And I hope the bullets didn't kill anyone. Then they passed around kunafeh and soda and we all drank and had a blast. They then sign some papers to finalize it.

From this point, some traditions vary. Oftentimes, the engaged couple is allowed to be alone together and go on dates. They are usually engaged from 2 months to a year, depending on how well they know each other before, how they want to prepare, and the financial / living situation of the couple. Sometimes the groom is like one of the family now and can be at social gatherings of the family and spend time with the women of the family while they aren't wearing their hijab. People vary, though, at this stage depending on their views of Islam and Islamic marriage traditions. Many people are Westernizing more and more, it seems. But, I got to see the engagement thing! Super cool.

Then, we went home teaching! It was nonexistent before we got here, but Mark and the Branch President have been little angels and arranged it. Thanks Mark! We went and taught Salim. He is so humble and great and was very grateful for our visit.

[A snack and a lesson. A feast on both ends.]

Adventure continues. We went to a place where they take old olive tree wood that is cut down to clear land for new development and such and they make them into beautiful things. We toured the little shop and then saw and purchased some finished projects. 

[Each spot has a drill so that he can carve like 10 blocks at a time.]

[He traces one finished piece with one of the drills and it carves it into the 9 other ones. Cool!] 

[The finished products!] 

The adventure CONTINUES! I did a bunch of other stuff that I can't remember right now because I didn't take pictures because I kept forgetting my camera. But, we did go to Petra, Wadi Rum, and Aqaba this weekend! So here is that update.

Petra was too legit to quit. It was just like Indiana Jones! I was so impressed with all of the amazing things they did. Those Nabateans...

[Approaching the Treasury through a gorgeous canyon thing.]

[This is me in front of the Treasury! But they didn't let me inside to see the big crevasse that Indiana Jones almost fell into... So I was pouting for the picture.]

[BUT, I did get to pet the jamals, so I was happy.]

The next thing I know, I'm trekking across this desert land toward the Monastery. I look over and what do I see??? Our good old buddies Scott and Chris riding those jamals. Pretty funny sight. They did a great job. 

[Just a couple of G6's doing what they do.]

We got to the Monastery and WOW it was cool.

[Soooo big, soooo pretty.]

[From the inside. How did they get the room so square?!?! Did people come later and make it so, or did the Nabateans do it? I need to research...]

Then we got to the Garden Tomb and climbed up an amazing ledge to see it. Pictures not included but I have some, family. 

[Doing something.]

THEN, we didn't have much time, so I had to put on my speedy boots to get to the High Place of Sacrifice and then back down the other side in time. So I trotted up that mountain and passed the Lion's Fountain thingy and also saw a herd of goats. Then I found the Place of Sacrifice and some nice girls from Belgium took my picture on it. Donkey shane, ladies.

[They came up here to sacrifice animals. This trip to a high place to offer sacrifice has other meanings too, which I was able to ponder on a little bit...]

[Waiting to head out...]

Then we hit that duuuusty trail and headed for Wadi Rum, the desert land of the Bedouin. We got to stay in a camplike resort that was really nice but was still supposed to feel like we were in the desert. And we were. We sped across the desert on some trucks and saw some nice dunes in the middle of nowhere. It was soooo pretty. There is such a unique beauty in each landscape. Wow, each thing was breathtaking. God made this world full of incredible scenery.

[On the trucks!]

[Epic dune shot.]

[Of course Logan had to make a sand angel. He IS an angel. We're best friends and we never have to be alone.]

[Of course I had to do a handstand.]

THEN, we had a great feast to break the fast and we saw the sunset over the desert hills. So gorgeous. Then we slept in some tents (pics not included). We woke up the next morning, got some delish breakfast and peaced out in our bus to Aqaba, Jordan's only Red Sea port. It's recently become a really nice tourist town and feels kinda like Southern California in some regards. Except the mosques in Aqaba are more frequent and everyone speaks Arabiiii! We checked into a hotel that had UNLIMITED water. Like, you could take a shower and not turn it off between getting wet, soaping up, and rinsing. It was really nice. And hot, too. I forgot how nice that is!

[This is a newer mosque on the coast. Too gorgeous to document.]

[Then we had dinner and I found something that I LOVE—ice cream.]

[So I did what I do to all things I love and devoured it with much noisiness.]

[The mosque at night.]

The beach at Aqaba was the absolute bomb. On saturday I swam in it for a few hours, snorkeling with the coolest fish I've ever seen. Then on sunday I did the same thing! I snorkeled and also went for a nice ocean swim. Mommy I missed you! You would've loved it soooo much. The water was perfect temperature and too blue. Gosh I was dying with excitement!!! It was heaven! Under water! Oh man just thinking about it makes me want to be back there. Oh man oh man. It was beyond comprehension. Too much beauty for this little boy! So I swam up and down the coast and found fishes of every kind. Big ones and little ones of every color. And a giant silver snake fish that I don't really know. 

And there was this sunken ship that we swam out to. Goodness it was soo nice. Okay, enough of that. One day I'll go back, insha'allah. God was so good to let me experience this weekend. I have no complaints!

[We had the beach all to ourselves pretty much. It's Ramadan, so all of the Muslims were gone!]

[A selfie. Man I want to be in that water! Israel is the foggy land in the center and Egypt is the foggy land on the left.] 

[Driving away. One of the saddest goodbyes of my life.,,]

I must write more on Ramadan. This is the month of fasting for Muslims, meaning no food or drink while the sun is up. They have a prayer at sunrise that starts the fast, and then another one at sunset that breaks the fast. I've fasted for the first few days to experience it with them. I'm not really fasting for them, but for God. I have so many things to fast for and I'm grateful for the chance to unite in an act of faith with them, for God. It is different in the city now that Ramadan has started. Our work day got cut down to 10-3 each day. Wow. And no one in on the streets during the day. People are tired, understandably, and sometimes a little irritable. But overall, I'm very impressed and lifted to see so many people unite in a religious act like this. It's illegal to eat on the streets, I'm told. I don't know how really illegal it is to eat in public, but several people have told me that you'll go to prison if you eat in public. Haven't tested it; don't plan on it.

Anyway, this is too big. More on cool things later! I'm gonna peace out like a little girl scout.

Catchup

[Up the stairs to view the city...]

So catchup. I have been having too much fun and not broadcasting enough, I guess. I just found this old post that I didn't actually finish (and therefore didn't post), so I'll write a quick summary and move onto bigger and better things.

The pic above is of us at a person's home that we met from church. They are gov't people I think. They have an awesome house down at the end of Rainbow Street. This pic is of their courtyard thingy. Their house wraps around it and they have a nice center area to relax in. Quite nice. I think I'll put one in me own house one day.

[This is what we find. Very nice!]

The view was spectacular. 

Moving on! We went to Ajloun and Umm Qais. This was like two or three weeks ago, I think. Ajloun houses a nice castle up on a hill. Pictures tell all!

[The approach]

[Me and my habibi Mark inside the castle]

[Outrageous ceilings]

Then we went to Umm Qais, which is pretty much the closest Jordanian soil to Syria and Israel, located right by the Sea of Galilee. Old Roman ruins and such. Mark and I made sure to take several modeling photos in case all of the male GQ models get assassinated. Or maybe it was the G6 models, I don't remember. Anywho, you never know when you'll need to beef up your portfolio, right?

[Exhibit A]

[And B (we don't actually know what models do when people take their pictures. obviously)]

And then nature called, so we went to the bathroom. And we found the most beautiful bathroom EVER! This is the sink where you wash your hands. The wall in front opens up into the clear sky and plants are growing all around. You can see blue skies and feel the gentle breeze... It was very relaxing. 

[It was like meditating and peeing at the same time]

And then there was this cool spot where they had black columns and white columns from an old temple. It was awesome.

[Waaaaay cool color shkeeem]

Short and sweet. Just like a shot glass of mint tea.

Bakering

Hey family!!! Guess what? Hurray! I have finally found a job at a bakery. I don't know why I didn't pursue it earlier, but I really did this past week and it paid off. But first, some other things happened too!

We went to Habiba's. It's a dessert company that has delicious Middle Eastern food. We oftentimes will go to the one down in the city center in a quaint alley next to the bank, but this time we went to the mother of all Habiba's. It's like a big, fancy sit-down restaurant for just desserts. :) So we had a good time. In the picture you can see the fanciness of the setting in the background. In the foreground we have the stunning and delightfully curious Marc Jay, who never ceases to warm my heart with his smile, grace, and laughter. I love you roomie. You are loved and appreciated! By me. And by others, too. But especially by me! :)

[He went with the hairy kunaafa. I went with something else delicious , but I forgot his name.]

We also went to another festival at the King Hussein Gardens! This was quite a new experience. The Arabs in attendance were super Western—lots of uncovered hair, lots of hipsters, lots of free drinks, Western tunes, excellent English speakers, etc. It was to promote new ideas and business products and such, and it actually gave me lots of hope for Jordan's future! Some of the people I work with seem to be stuck in a rut of complacency because of harsh circumstances, which causes a lack of drive and efficiency and productivity plummet. I really do love all of the people around me at work, these are just some observations I've made. However, at this festival people were full of life and drive and excitement for the future. And they were all young, talented, educated, beautiful, wonderfully Jordanian people. So that was fun. I got my blood tested for free at one booth! They tested me and asked if I had drunk a Pepsi or eaten right before the test. I told them I had eaten a ton that day, the last time being about an hour prior. They told me I needed to go to a professional blood clinic and get a full check. They said my blood sugar and hemoglobin levels were totally wack. But then I explained that I had run 20 miles that morning for marathon training and that I had been eating a full meal every two hours for the entire day to reach a full recovery. And they looked relived and said I was probably fine and don't worry about it. My body was just trying recover. So I didn't worry about it! And I am fully recovered and healthy. No worries.

We also went to the King Hussein Mosque at the Gardens. I visited before, but this time we went in and got to witness the evening prayer. Very cool. We were walking toward the mosque as the sun was setting, and the call to prayer began. Soooooo beautiful. And then we made our way with the Muslims into the prayer room. The girls brought scarves to cover their heads this time so that we could all go in. We went to the men's area and the women to the women's. It was so beautiful and peaceful. Indescribable, really. 

[Markie Poo and Loagie Bear checking out the inscription on the Mosque wall. I love my roomies.]

[Purty, huh? I loved being there with so many people of faith. It really is a holy spot...]

The next item of business is my new dew / do / due. I guess it is "do" because that's how you spell hairdo? My hairs were getting really long and shaggy and my coworker kept asking me and asking me why I hadn't cut my hair yet. Like, really, I could tell he thought it was pretty horrendous. And then another coworker told me that my hair was ugly and made me look really old. He told me I should gel it straight back or cut it or something—just change it somehow. I told him that my mommy back in Arkansas likes long hair on boys and so that I'm used to long hair, cause that's what I had all growing up! That didn't help much. But it's true! And I love you mommy, so don't worry I fought as hard as I could. But in all truth, it was getting there, you know? Like pretty long. And if I were at the beach, I'd've kept it. But I'm in Amman. So I got it cut!!!!! And here's the proof. 

[Before. When I was "ugly and old."]

[After. When I'm "young and exactly like all the shabaab I see on the street." Convenient how that happened...]

Yeah, so that's the new me. The Arab me. All of the guys here have super gelled hair and short, tidy, cuts. So when I went to get a hair cut I told him to just take off a little bit everywhere but to keep pretty much the same look. And he just kept cutting and cutting and then he gelled my hair and parted it real fancy for me and gave me "the Italian swoop" as he called it (that's the cute flippy thing in the front, I guess). So yeah! Pretty new. I've never had that look, but I guess I fit in a lot better now. And people comment on how the good the change was for me. Like A LOT of people at work comment on how much better it is. And my boss said that with long shaggy hair (which he always calls "not nice") I look 24 or 25, but with this new cut, I look 18 or 19. So I guess that's good? I don't actually gel my hair every day, just the day that the dude cut it. So it actually looks pretty normal and not very short. It's a good cut and I like it. It was just funny to see the cultural differences!

Okay. Now onto the gooood stuff. Bread! I took some pictures of where I work. I have class two nights a week and then the Sabbath is Friday, so I usually can go in Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday nights and then Saturdays for a while when we don't take group trips to wonderful places around Jordan. I just showed up at a bakery and said that I want to learn how to make bread and viola! I was in like flint, or however that saying goes. The owner wasn't there, but they let me work with them and said they'd ask the owner if I could work for real at the bakery each day. He showed up two days later. His 13-yr-old son was one of the guys working so he had told him all about me—"Boolos" the American who wants to learn Arab bread so that he can actualize his dream of opening his own bakery in the States, cause that's what I told him. The boss came and watched us for a while and then pulled me aside and we had a good chat. He doesn't know a lick of English which is awesome for me. Actually none of the workers do, so I get to learn Arabic AND bread in one session. It's like heaven. Only hotter, kinda like hell. But not really because the bakery is a place of happiness and learning and laughter and delicious smells and tastes. Anyway, so we are talking and he asks me what I expect and want from working. All the workers want me to just quit at the Ministry and work with them all day, but I told them that I have to go to the Ministry because it's part of my schooling and I want to graduate and such. I think they wanted to pay me, too, but I told him that I honestly just wanted his knowledge and to get to use his equipment and so the boss told me I was welcome to work for him! He's a great guy. He also told me that his dream is to open an Arab bakery in the States. He told me we should go into business together. So yeah, he's a great guy and I love the bakery. I got a few shots that kinda outline the bakery.

[Das oven. The tanks of gas heat it. The round thing spins slowly in a big arc.]

[Fire. It gets very hot. Heated from below and above.]

[We form the balls of dough (on floor) and then put them through this machine to flatten them.]

[Then stack them in these trays. All the ones stacked on the left are full.]

[Then put them in das oven and let them do a full two rotations.]

[And then slide them off and stack them on racks to cool for a minute before baggin them in 2kg (4.4 pounds) bags. It's 50 JD cents which is about 71 US cents. So cheap!]

The young guy holding his hand out toward the majesty of the oven is Ahmad. He's the baker's son. We are tight. I love working at the bakery. It's good to just chat and work with the Arabs after a day of translating super technical government documents. The pictures show the normal pita bread, but we bake lots of other kinds as well. It's so tasty. There is an Egyptian, a Syrian, a Jordanian, an Iraqi, and an American guy (that's me) that work at the bakery. We are a pretty rag-tag bunch and each have our own story of how we got here, but we have fun. The Iraqi guy grew up his whole life in Baghdad and was 15 when America began the whole occupation business. He came here two years ago and has a wild story, but that's for another time...

Family, I will make us some of this good bread and we can have a nice Middle Eastern meal when I get back. I'm already excited! Tomorrow morning I'm meeting them at the bakery at 5am to start the mixing process for the dough! I'm pumped. And then we'll work a while and then I'll do my long Saturday run, then take a quick nap before we leave Amman at 12 for our trip to Ajloun and Umm al-Qais just a little ways north-east of here, I think. Not super sure, but it's supposed to be gorgeous. Life is just wonderful out here. Momma, I hope your marathon training is going well! I'm so impressed that my mommy is doing it with me! You are a pro and I hope I can keep up with you. I've never run that far in my life!

Well, I'm out. Stay safe family and I'll see you before you know it! Heidi, have a blast at BYU this summer and when I get there we'll party like no brother and sister have every partied. I love you guys!

My best selfie so far!

I have had so many incredible experiences in the past week! I really won't be able to even scratch the surface with this post, but I'll try and include lost of pictures. You can just use your  imaginations and make up funny stories with me in them. Just be creative and try and think like me and I'm sure you'll be able to fill in all of the dots!

Our journey starts with a wonderful trip to the Jordan River Baptismal Site, where Jesus was baptized (at least somewhere along the river). We had a wonderful morning on the bus and stopped at Mt. Nebo along the way. On a clear day from Mt. Nebo you can see Jerusalem, Jericho, and several other cool cities. Luckily we were there on a very clear day and saw all the cool sites. It's kind of a weird to see Israel from Jordan. We hear so much about Israel from the people around us each day and so to finally see it is somewhat like, Woah. Of course we hear a highly biased opinion, but I really like hearing the extremes on both sides to just try and get inside their shoes and see each point of view. That's one reason I like the BYU study abroad—we spent time on both sides of the border and with both people to learn both sides. But so far I've only heard the Muslim- Arab- Palestinian/Jordanian point of view. 

Anyway, it was really cool to see these ancient cities from afar and it make me want to go there! The baptismal site was cool. The picture shows our group members on the Jordanian side, just a few yards from Israel. We aren't allowed to communicate with people on the other side. It was pretty and warm and I loved it.

[Jordan River]

After the Jordan River we went to the Dead Sea and went to a resort thing. It was super posh and felt really weird after living in my apartment in Amman for a bit. But it was really really nice. We had a BUFFET which was sooo weird but delicious. So much food and it was really good. All middle eastern delights. Then we suited up and swam in the Dead Sea! It was so dead. And salty! And I floated on the water. It was so cool. I'm kinda skinny and so usually if I hold my breath and try and float in the water, I sink. But this time I could actually float on top! It was out of this world and I really really couldn't stop laughing. It was sooooo fun. Anyway, I loved it. Point made. 

Then we loaded up with that precious mud and scrubbed and exfoliated and became beautiful. It was like a dream. Putting mud on yourself and each other and it was socially acceptable. So wonderful. I let mine dry and I looked really good. Logan Tatham—you would be so proud of how manly we were. I needed you and your mate and your fancy clothing. Hopefully one day we'll do it together!

Then we swam in their fancy pools and woah, I just loved swimming. We had a blast and several of us got burned. I didn't thanks to Marc's SPF 85 sunscreen, which we applied to our bodies twice! Quite a day! A good break from the office translation work. Oh yeah, and then when we got home and about to eat dinner, Lindsay (an American here with another program) called Stefanie (a girl in my program) and asked if she wanted to go to a wedding in a city not far from Amman that I won't mention the name of. And Stefanie said a guy could come with her and so I got to go! A real Arab Muslim wedding. Super awesome. This family was a little more modern and chose to do the wedding mixed—both guys and girls in the same area. Traditional weddings separate men and women for dancing and fun and then bring them back together for a few key events. The bride and groom came down a stair case with disco lights, fireworks, and blaring music. There was so much energy in the air! And everyone was so happy! Many engagements last around a year, so the anticipation has been built up so much and everyone was very excited for this couple.

I got to dance all night with the people! They taught me some more belly dancing and even formed a circle for me to show off my moves. It was really just a load of fun. All of the girls had gotten all gussied up and had incredibly beautiful and snazzy hijabs and dresses. And since we were guests, they treated us like royalty. I got to witness several cool cultural things such as presented the bride with golden jewelry, giving the couple gifts of money, and the debka dance (it's for the dudes and very awesome. I got to jump in too). It was a beautiful end to a wonderful day. Long live marriage.

[Bride and Groom making their entrance!]

[Dancing! Notice the girls and guys together! But they only dance close is they are sisters and brothers, I'm pretty sure.]

[My best selfie. Selfie is a new english word I learned this week that means you take a picture of yourself. So I thought I'd include this one of me. From a bus ride.]

Then on saturday we went to Sahab for a classic Arab dinner with a family of Logan's Arab friend. We got there by a crazy chain of buses and taxis. We arrived at the home at around 5:15 and began the chatting. We chatted for about an hour and then they brought out drinks. Then we chatted for another hour. The Arabs recited some poetry for us and, of course, kept saying "ahlah w sahlan" every time the conversation died down. Then they sent someone out to buy food for dinner. Then we kept chatting. And chatting. Then we kept chatting for a while. It is they way they do things here. Go and chat and have drinks. And then around 9:15 they invited us into the sitting room for dinner! It was an awesome traditional sit-down-eat-a-million-dishes kind of meal. Great chicken seasoned with so many delicious herbs. I actually tasted a lot of cardemom, which I really haven't tasted since Finland. Sooo good. Chicken rice olives laban vegetables pasta bread fish... Just so much. And they just pile it on and pile it on for you. We ate for an hour and then went back to talking and more drinks. Then we all sang songs and more poetry. And then we ate a bunch of bananas and oranges for desert. And then we began the departure rituals, meaning we say we have to leave a few times and then an hour later we get to leave. I think it was 12:45 when we got home. Yep, just checked with Leigh. It was a late one. But I loved it. It was such an experience.

[Sitting down to feast.]

I also have started my Jordanian Colloquial class. We are six or so in the class and have a blast. Our instructor's name is Doctor Khaled and he is super funny and a great teacher. I've learned so many new words. It's also really nice to know the grammar and reasons behind the changes in Jordanian Arabic. Most of it I've heard before on the streets or from other readings, but I get to ask any questions I like and Dr. Khaled knows how to talk about linguistics, which is very rare among other Arabs I've met.

I love it!!!

[The celebrated and heralded ustaaz doctor khaled!]

[We got the lyrics to a song and then listened to it and had to put it in order! Just another fun day in class...]

Here is the link to the song. I really adore it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fv1jrS_3Mbw

You can skip forward a minute to hear the singing if you like, or you can listen to the beautiful Middle Eastern instruments!

So much is going on here! It's a blast. I'm still at the Ministry of Social Development doing translation projects and speaking with people in efforts to get better at Arabic (and of course to help develop Jordan socially). I also got to go to my boss's house to meet his rad son who is going to 'merica this week to finish his air force training at an American base. Very cool.

THEN...... I continued an amazing week by attending a conference at the Religious Institute of Inter-Faith Relations on how to use Social Media to promote good citizenship, move social development projects forward, and promote productive inter-faith dialogue. It lasted two days and was pretty sensational. We had some visitors come in from Lebanon. They were young, super hipster, tech-savy bosses. It was a blast and I became friends with a bundle of delightful young Arabs.

We were split up into several groups and picked topics to do a small project on. We had 24 hours to do it. Our group chose citizenship in Jordan. They have some problems with nationality and identity. Oftentimes you'll ask someone where they're from and they say, Palestine, or Kuwait, or Egypt. Sometimes these people really are immigrants from these countries and have just arrived. But most of the time, in my experience, they haven't even visited the country they say they're from— or maybe their family has lived here for several generations. And so they won't say they're Jordanian, despite being here for so long and having very few connections to other countries. This behavior hearkens back to the cultural and historical emphasis of family and tradition and heritage in the Middle East. So... the Jordanians in my group wanted to do a project to promote Jordanianness. So we made a facebook group and made a video, etc to promote it. You can check it our it you like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPrjnlRKGHA

[Train me, baby]

[Notice the hipsterness. Okay maybe not totally hipster, but pretty modern. Pretty cool.]

[Here we be.]

Well, I must be off now. This short description really can't do any justice to the experiences and magic in my life right now. LOVE